![The Tao of Kyle… Friend, Actor, Poet, Director… Farmer?]()
by Richard Timothy | May 11, 2010 | Gratefully Grateful, I Think There's a Point, Life Characters, My List of Things that Don't Suck, Non-Fiction, Observationally Speaking, When I Was a Kid
There are some farewells that truly are events, were people wear dinner jackets, and sometimes retired space astronaut shows up because they heard there was an open bar, and they really had no plans for the weekend. At some farewells drinks are consumed with such exacting repetition that those drinking could give any synchronized swimming show in Vegas a run for its money. Point of clarification here, by farewell I do not mean… passed on, no more, ceased to be, expired and gone to meet ‘is maker, a stiff, bereft of life, rests in peace, who’s metabolic processes is now history, is off the twig, has kicked the bucket, is shuffled off the mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisible, or is an ex-parrot, err human, and thank you to the Parrot Sketch for their assistance in that explanation. No, by farewell I mean that person being farewelled simply has moved to a new location on this planet that is no longer a short drive away, but at least you can still talk on the phone.
Then there are some farewells, like the one I had this past Saturday, which consisted of the me, the fareweller, saying farewell to my friend Kyle, the farwellee. Kyle and I have been best friends since 7th grade. Now if we were both in 8th grade, it would really not be that impressive of a feat, but considering we are bother in our mid 30s some of you will think to yourself, “well done” while others will think, “what an old fart.”
It was the first day of school and I was standing in the lunch line, minding my own business, hoping that they would be serving tater tots for lunch, and the next thing I hear a conversation that sounds like it’s directed at me. I looked around and saw nothing. Then I look down, and there beside me was this little redheaded kid, in glasses, looking up at me waiting for a response. I half expected him ask, “Please sir, may I have some more?” But the second we make eye contact he instead said, “Don’t you just hate it when you are standing in line and some stranger walks up to you and just starts talking to you?”
I gave him an odd smile, and told him I really didn’t know… and so began the 25 year (and going) conversation that is my and Kyle’s friendship. As it turns out, I do not hate it when people walk up next to me when I am standing in a line and start talking with me, well unless it’s because they want to sell me a watch, or ask me for some money. I guess you could say I learned that from Kyle. There have actually been a number of things over the year I’ve learned from Kyle. Here are just a few of them:
-
The only proper way to eat French fries it to dip them into your Wendy’s chocolate Frosty, or chocolate milkshake if the a fore mentioned Frosty is not available.
- The best way to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich is with a glass of chocolate milk… which you dip the sandwich into. He has always been a firm supporter that if something is good, adding a chocolate flavored dairy product to the consumption process is only going to make it better.
- A great deal of my musical education is thanks to Kyle. He introduced me to The Cure, Depeche Mode, The Dead Kennedy’s, Benny Goodman, Leon Redbone, Blues Traveler, REM, Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix, Bob Dylan, The Grateful Dead, U2, Bob Marley, Concrete Blond, Patsy Cline, and Sigur Ros… just to name a few.
- He introduced me to The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran.
- He introduced me to the first girl I ever made out with. I was freshman, she was a senior… I was pretty sure I deserved a medal for it.
- He gave me my first Terry Pratchett book, Good Omens, even though it was a co-author project with Neil Gaiman… and he gave me my first Neil Gaiman book.
- He did introduce me to the work of William S. Burroughs as well, but has since apologized for that.
- He introduced me to the television series MST3K, for which I will be forever grateful.
- I went to my first concert with him, Ziggy Marley and the Melody Makers.
- He also introduced me to the work of Hunter S. Thompson… he may have apologized for that too.
-
He was my proxy drunk for the many years that I spent not drinking. He would always make sure that for every New Years we celebrated together he would drink enough for two.
- He introduced me to Opus and Bill, aka Bloom County.
- He gave me a lot of advice I ignored when I was young, and that I look forward to now that I’m older.
- We would hang out in my basement and write really bad open-verse non-rhyming poetry, which in looking back was my gateway writing style. It was the beat poets that really got us breaking out of the conventional boring rhyme writing process that was the lyrical love child of Dr. Seuss and iambic pentameter. I do think that my love affair with writing started back then. Removing rhyme and playing with words opened up a whole new realm of creativity and appreciation in writing. I started writing longer poems and eventually moved over to short stories, and have never looked back. Except now, because I needed to look back and explain it a bit.
I could keep going, but I think the point has been made. It has been quite the adventure so far. The farewell arrived rather quickly. He’d only been in town a few months. Still, it was a really good few months having him within driving distance again. The thing about Kyle is that he is the epitome of a true Goonie, the adventure never really ends with that man. This farewell is, for now, a 9 month endeavor. I mean regardless of how long he’ll be away, he’ll be back for New Years. It’s a kind of ceremony if you will. We’ve only missed spending it together a few times in the past 25 years.
So where is he off to? I only bring it up because it is so inherently him. He’s going back to his roots, back to the path that his forefathers took. He has chosen to become a farmer for the next few months. The one small difference, instead of corn, or wheat, or barley, or chickens, or whatever it was that his ancestors grew, the crop he’ll be growing is cannabis. Yep, the man is off to California to grow about 50 plants for a local dispensary. I think he loves having that conversation with people as well, mainly because he can. He’s not doing anything illegal. He will be growing the crow within the guidelines of the state of California. Plus, it’s a good way to make a year’s salary in only nine months time. His degree in directing hasn’t really assisted him with where he’d like to be or what he’d like to be doing, especially when it comes to theatre. The thing is, there is a good chance that becoming a farmer is going to enable him to pay off all his student loans in one harvest. I do find that to be subtly poetic.
Our farewell consisted of just him and me sitting in a booth at a restaurant, having breakfast for lunch and reminiscing about the past four months. Then it was time for the farewell gifts. What does someone like me get someone like Kyle as a farewell gift? It’s easy really, the first thing I gave him was the books he had lent me to read while he was in town. Second, I gave him a DVD of Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along-Blog, but it is just the type of thing that is going to make him happy to watch and it will give him some new musical songs to memorize through repetition, so the next time he visits we can watch it together and sing along to all the songs while we act it out in my television room. Also, it is a standard viewing staple in anyone’s DVD library.
Finally, I returned the favor and gave him a copy of one of my favorite Terry Pratchett books, Small Gods, which he has not yet had the pleasure of reading. And then we said, “See you.” and that was that. The farewell was done and I went home to mow the lawn. A bit anti-climactic I know, but sometimes that’s life.
What are some of the things that you have learned from one of your best friends over the years?
Image Sources:
Google Images, key words: Parrot Sketch, tall boy and short boy, fries in frosty, Opus and Bill, New Years, and Dr. Horrible.
by Richard Timothy | May 10, 2010 | Gratefully Grateful, Holiday Banter, Life Characters, My List of Things that Don't Suck, Non-Fiction, Observationally Speaking, When I Was a Kid
One of the problems that I find with Smirking on the day of a holiday is whether or not I am going to have some free time to get some writing done on that holiday. Some holiday’s works out great, some result in me getting a Smirk posted on the day of, but just before around midnight so it can still be technically posted on the day of. Then there are holidays, like yesterdays Mother’s Day, which takes all of my writing time for the day because the holiday requires me to bask in the celebration of the holiday. If I hadn’t been so exhausted from spending a few hours running around the back yard with my 5 year old niece perhaps I could have gotten something done. But between the water fights, 27 times we played use the lawn darts to hit basketball game (they were the plastic ones), playing house, having a tea party with two baby dolls and three Barbie’s and one of Barbie’s horses, and helping her climb a few trees, I was a touched pooped by the time I got home. So with all that being said, today gets to be my (post) Mother’s Day Smirk.
Contrary to popular belief, Mother’s was not originally a pagan holiday. Ok, so maybe I’m the only one who has ever assumed Mother’s day was at its origin a Pagan holiday, but it’s my fail safe explanation. If you don’t know the origin or a holiday, just blame it on the Pagans. It’s worked pretty will for me so far. I guess that’s what I get for assuming though. Of course, you know what happens when you assume? Apparently a spell is cast and you are turned into a donkey named Ume… or something close to that. Maybe, assuming is, at its origin, a pagan thing? It sure explains that whole shape shifting donkey thing. Actually, it all depends on what origins of the holiday you are after, if you look at all the Mother’s Day holidays around the globe, we really do need to give some credit to the Pagans… thanks Pagans! As for today’s information on the holiday it is based on the US version of Mother’s Day.
Mother’s on the other hand, are just like the heart, the brain, and the nervous system. We are all born with one and we would not be here without one. Despite all our differences, mothers are one of those things that make us all the same. That is, at least, until human cloning becomes a standard practice of human devolution.
The present day version of Mother’s Day was inspired one Ann Jarvis. Back in 1868 she set out to create a Mother’s Friendship Day, which was designed to bring families who had been divided during the Civil War back together. Before the movement gained any substantial momentum Ann died on May 9th, 1905. It was her daughter Anne Marie Jarvis that keep Ann’s work going. It took a few years, but on May 12, 1907 there was a memorial service held at an Episcopal Church in West Virginia honoring all mothers. The first “official” service happened a year later on May 10, 1908. Anne then started a campaign to establish Mother’s Day as a national US holiday.
In 1910, West Virginia officially declared Mother’s Day an official holiday. The nice thing about that is who is going to say no to a holiday celebrating mothers, especially in congress. I mean there are some things that are passed that people are going to rant and bellow against it. I mean how big of a gluteus maximus article of clothing that you place on your head do you have to be to vote against something like a day to celebrate your mom? I would assume and hope that it was a unanimous decision to follow suit, because it did not take long for the other states to jump on the Mother’s Day wagon. Then on May 8, 1914 the US Congress passed a law making the second Sunday of May Mother’s Day. The next day, Woodrow Wilson proclaimed May 9, 1914 the first national Mother’s Day… ok so that really wasn’t so much funny as it is educational, but I did find it interestingly educational as opposed to yawnishly education.
Now because mothers are people too, they are all different, unique, and simply put, human. Some mothers are good, some are not. Some are nothing more than incubators, and some are your best friend your entire life. Some share DNA with you and some do not, but one thing is universal about them, they are our mother.
My dad’s mother, well sadly, I never met her. She was gone before I made my grand entrance onto the planet, but I’ve heard stories and seen photos of her. Her photos always reminded me of the incarnation of Santa’s special lady, Mrs. Claus. According to the stories my dad has shared about her, I’m going to have to say that I am about 76% sure that she actually was Santa’s main squeeze, or at the very least related to the family in some way.
As for my mom’s mom, she was a product of the great depression, a little hard, and very set in her ways, but we always had a grand time when visiting, which was about 2 to 3 times a week, and we were always welcomed. I’m not sure why, but one of my first thoughts about her is always her unexpected and always entertaining use of colorful metaphors. They were always said under her breath and when she didn’t think anyone was listening. It was more of an involuntary thing for her than anything else. It was a result of everyday “oops” type situations. Things like dropping a fork from the dinner table, accidentally pricking her finger with a sewing needle, or dropping a washed dish while she was drying it by hand. Each of these situations would trigger an automatic cursing expulsion. This whispered flurry of words would always give my siblings and me a fit of the giggles, which we would blame on the cartoons we would be watching. I never dared repeat any of the words I learned from grandma until I was at least in junior high school. For the record, it wasn’t your standard back ally, drunken sailor profanity either. It was just your standard, run of the mill, ok-for-70’s television profanity.
Then there are the Karen’s. Both Angela’s mother and my mother are named Karen, which is of Danish origin meaning pure. As far as mother’s go, actually as far as people go, I’ve never met a woman so devoted, concerned, loving, worried for and unconditionally loving and supporting as my mom. My only gripe is that she is one of those older generation mothers who believe serving others is what a large part of life is about, which is fine, but she does have a difficult time receiving anything for herself and accepting how amazing she truly is. Interestingly enough my new, second mom, Angela’s Karen is a bit similar in this behavior as well.
There is a song by Natalie Merchant that, from the first time I heard it, reminded me of my mom. It very simply, accurately, and beautifully put into song the way I feel about her. It was the song that I dedicated to her, and dance with her to, on my wedding. I suppose you could call it my official Mom song. So for this Mother’s Day, and for every Mother’s Day to come, I dedicate the song Kind and Generous to my mom’s, Karen and Karen, and to all the secondary mother’s I had growing up, Anson’s mom Helen, Kyle’s mom Carol, and Buck’s mom Nan. To my mother’s… (Note: There are two songs in the attached video, the first song is the one I’m referring too. I would have linked the official video, but I think it takes away from the message I find in the song.)
Thank you and I love you.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A89kgQK3pfU&feature=fvw]
(Click here if video did not play. Click here to see the lyrics.)
What song would you dedicate to your mother?
Image Sources:
Google Images, key words: dad spinning daughter, pagans, mothers day, mrs claus, and mom hugging son.
![The Tao of Kyle… Friend, Actor, Poet, Director… Farmer?]()
by Richard Timothy | May 5, 2010 | Gratefully Grateful, I Think There's a Point, My List of Things that Don't Suck, Non-Fiction, Observationally Speaking, Public Service Announcement, Reviewed and Recommended, Utahism
I am a bit plagued at the moment, and have been since Sunday evening. No, it is not because I have killed and eaten that damn bird that yes, still flurries against my bedroom window every morning. I will say, at least after a few weeks it’s finally starting to wear down. It now only attacks the window once every 20 to 30 minutes instead of the repetitious attacks that it was so fond of when I first decided that the window was a worthy adversary.
As for the plague, it’s not your traditional “I’m not dead yet” kind of plague. It is however a plague that I imagine everyone has suffered from more than once throughout their life. I’ve honestly lost track of how many times I’ve had it myself. This time is a little more aquatic in theme. I’ve been thinking in a rather repetitious way that I’d like to be… under the sea, spending some time in the shade of an octopus’s garden. Yes, I’ve acquired the infamous “song stuck in my head” plague. And this time around I’m stuck regurgitating an underwater tune that a quartet from Liverpool first sang about back in 1969. I think blaming my friend Kyle for this might be feasible. He’s the one that got me a ticket to the play that I heard the song at. Along with the blame I suppose I also need to thank him, because it was a really good show.
One of the theatre companies in Salt Lake is called SLAC, Salt Lake Acting Company, who just so happens to be turning 40 this next year… well done there. I usually make it to one show a year, and this year I even though I’m planning on going to their next show, I really had no plans on seeing the one I went to on Sunday. The play was called Charm. It’s a new play from a now local playwright named Kathleen Cahill. I believe she’s been in Utah for around three years now. The performance was even a World Premiere. Ohhh I know, sounds impressive doesn’t it? I think it just means that SLAC was the first place on this planet to officially perform the play. It is pretty cool to be able to have that as a snobbish theatre conversation piece. It’s like being that person that saw U2 perform in a pub in front of 25 people and purchased one of their demo cassettes because they thought they just might go somewhere. Or in short, this is one of my “I knew them before they were famous” stories.
One of those truly great moments in life is when you go to see a performance while in a state of ignorance. I had no idea what the play was about and I had no idea what to expect, and the show consistently exceeded any expectations I could have put on it had I known what to expect. I mean when you have no expectations for a show and then leave the show disappointed or unmoved, that is a tragedy. But for this performance, I walked out of the show jovial and assured in my belief that the world is a brilliant place. It made my good day a great day.
The show was, as the program put it, “Magical, surreal and transcendentally goofy.” It was a mostly satirical look at the life of one Margaret Fuller. She was a free spirit that lived in the 1800’s (1810 to 1850). She was very well educated and had managed to accomplish a few firsts in her day. Here are a few things I think are worth knowing about Margaret:
She was the first full time book reviewer in journalism.
- She was a supporter of woman’s rights, woman’s education and the right to employment.
- She also encouraged prison reform and the emancipation of slaves in the US.
- She became the first woman allowed to use the Harvard College library.
- She became the New York Tribune’s first female correspondent covering the Italian revolution.
- Nathaniel Hawthorne friendship with her used her personality for the inspiration for the character Hester Prynne in The Scarlet Letter.
A fare share of this is touched upon in the play. At first I thought a lot of the claims were embellished, because that is what I’ve come to expect from productions about historical figures. I really didn’t think that all of these claims were true. The play definitely peaked my interest about Margaret, and got me researching and reading up on her life. Her early departure from her life was a true tragedy. She only lived 40 years, and was traveling back from Italy with her lover, their child and her newest manuscript. The ship crashed 100 yards from Fire Island, New York and went down. None of their bodies were recovered and the manuscript was forever lost. I know it’s sad, still… what a full 40 years.
Charm took a look, a very playful look, at the relationships between Margaret and Emerson, Thoreau, and Hawthorne. The enjoyment of the play was only reinforced by the consistently strong performance by the entire cast. The set and props were minimal, and the movement and freedom it gave to the performers only added to my overall enjoyment of the play. I’d suggest that if you don’t have any plans between now and Sunday, and you live in the Salt Lake area, you should go check out this show. Sadly, it does ends on Sunday May 9th… so take you mom to it as well. I did do a little internet rummaging and it looks like Charm is part of the 2011 lineup at the Orlando Shakespeare Theater. It’s a piece that is definitely worth the two hours you spend watching it.
All that being said, it was during the performance that I heard the tune Octopus’s Garden, which I’ve never really given a lot of listening to. I mean, I think the Beatles are ok, but I don’t love them. I only own one of their CDs and it was a gift from a friend back in 1995 I think. I’ve listened to it a few times over the years, but I really do mean only a few time, like maybe 6 times tops in 15 years. I did go to a Beatles cover band concert last summer, which was a lot of fun. It was an outdoor concert and they were playing with the Utah Symphony Orchestra. I rained a lot I remember, but there was something wonderful about dancing to the Beatles outside on the side of a mountain in a soft cool summer rain with a glass of wine in my hand… it just made for a good night all the way around.
The point is, because I was in such an excessively good mood because of the play, that, when song came on, I connected it with how happy I was at that moment. Now, and for the past few days, I have been continually singing that song to myself and smiling the whole time. Even last night, as I was laying in bed, exhausted and trying to fall asleep, I was half humming, half snoring the melody of Octopus’s Garden to myself. It is subsiding some, but even as I write this and am listening to Neil Young in the background I’m still humming and singing to myself… “I like to be… under the sea… in an octopus’s garden in the shade…”
What of some of your “stuck in your head” songs?
Image Sources:
Goggle Images, key words: Charm by Kathleen Cahill, sleeping birds, Margaret Fuller, and octopus’s garden.
by Richard Timothy | Apr 25, 2010 | Gratefully Grateful, I Think There's a Point, It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, My List of Things that Don't Suck, Non-Fiction, Observationally Speaking, Public Service Announcement
I was going to post yesterday, but then I realized that today, or at the time tomorrow was going to be April 25. Yes 4/25, it seemed to be calling to me as the day that I should post my 100th Smirk. Oddly, posting number 100 on 4/24 would be like celebrating the New Years on the 30th instead of the 31st. If there ever was a day to share your 100th blog post with the world April 25 would be that day. Ok, fact is any day is a good day to post your 100th blog post. In my case, I was fine waiting a day so that could suggest that in some random numerological way, it meant something special, specialer… something whooo-ish. Truth of the matter is I just wanted to put the word numerological in one of my Smirks, because, well, it’s one of those words that always puts a smile on my face.
I know 100 is one of those important numbers in regards to television. I was never really sure why though. As it turns out when a television series hit episode 100 it is commonly the step required for a series to be considered for syndication in the US. I wonder if that means I’m now eligible for syndication in the US. Personally I think it’s a great idea (wink, wink, nudge, nudge).
I have watched a few 100th episodes from various series and what I do remember is that these episodes were usually pretty lame. It seems to be the episode dedicated to the highlighting past highlights, or as I like to call it, the flash back episode. As a fan it always felt like the class review before the big test next week.
I do have a theory about this though. I think it equates to the “too drunk to work” effect that happens in all realms of the daily function that is commonly referred to as work, or “a job”. I would venture that I’m not the only one who has arrived to work in the morning only to be confronted by a co-worker with lava red eyes and a sway remnant of a slouching metronome. They have that goofy smile on their face, which is a smile usually reserved for things that are eventually placed under the “seemed like a good idea at the time” category of personal stories. Then out comes the utterance, “I think I’m still drunk from last night.”
I understand that there are plenty of situations that result in drunken celebration. Your favorite team wins some championship… or just some game. Your Avatar in some virtual gaming world finally completed some huge super quest that you’ve been doing for 18 months. Your kid finally said Dada. It’s Prom. Your neighbors with that little yappy dog that never shuts up finally moved. Or, the demon bird that has been attacking your bedroom window every morning from 6 to 10 has innocently spontaneously combusted, which had nothing to do with the strategically placed heat lamps, magnifying glasses, mirrors, and a plate of birdseed. Regardless, there are endless possibilities that can ignite the need for celebration during a week night, which, if you spacing sucks, might result in you arriving to work a little wobbly.
I think this is what traditionally happens for the 100th episodes. Everyone on the show was whooping it up the night before in celebration of reaching their 100th episode and arrive to work the next morning in a mental state that isn’t exactly fitting to the work that needs to be done. So the producer gets a few lines out of them and then they spend the rest of the recovering while the production team uses a bunch of old footage to compile the 100th episode. Of course this is base on my extensive lack of knowledge when it comes to the television industry, but it does make sense.
So the question is what to do for big number 100? I’m not 100% sure. I mean other than having it be a mathematically consistent day (Monk would be so proud) and using the word numerological in today’s Smirk I feel pretty good about what’s been covered so far.
I would like to say thank you to all of you who read my Smirks. Thanks for e-mails, the comments, the stories you share, for the friends you introduce my writing to, and for coming back to see what I’ve written this time and to see if it gets your Smirk on. That’s one of the unexpected results I’ve gotten from the past 100 posts. It’s been the interaction I’ve had with you, the readers. My perspectives and tangents may have gotten you to smile and laugh, but you replies and encouragement have definitely returned that experience to me.
I write a Smirk to get you to smirk, causing you to reply to my Smirk about you smirking thus causing your smirk to get me to smirk. It’s a kind of the circle of life, but instead of lions we have smile and laughter, oh yeah, and people.
I did make reference to this a little while ago on my fan page, but one of the things I’m going to be doing is making an eBook out of the first 100 Smirks. It will be a little while before I get it out and offer it to everyone. I do need to get a proofreader to clean up some of the messy bits, and I’ll have to figure out what to do with the video segments and images. Once all of that is figured out, it should be about 150 or so pages of pure reading pleasure. And if the eBook does well enough, I’ll see if I can get some print copies made, if there is enough interest from people who would like one. I’ll keep you posted as this whole thing develops.
I do have one favor though. I call it the “share me” favor. If you have any friends that you think might get a bit of a smile or laugh from my writing, please share me with others. As you know, part of my main goal with my writing is to bring joy and laughter to others. The more people I can reach and share with, the more I can accomplish this goal. Also, a big thank you to all of you who have emailed links to my blog to your friends, who have posted my Smirks on your Facebook walls, who have suggested you friends to me so I could invite them to check out my writing, and simply, for sharing me with your friends. I appreciate your trust and you support.
It’s been a brilliant time so far and I can’t wait until I get to do another highlight of Smirk highlights post for when I reach number 200. Although, I really didn’t highlight anything did I? Well, maybe next time. Oh and for the record, that damn bird is still around, but I promise that once it finally buggers off, there is going to be a party!
I do feel a toast is in order though. So everyone get a glass of something… wine, beer, gin, orange juice, water, whatever works best for you. Don’t worry I’ll wait… ok great. So now that we’re all here and with a drink in hand, please join me in raising you glass.
Here’s to the first 100 Smirks and to all the smiles, joy, and laughter they have put into the world… and to all of you for being that source and conduit of all that joy and laughter. Thank you all. Cheers!
What are your thoughts on Smirk 100?
Image Sources:
Google Images, key words: 100, thank you, cheers, drunk at work, and share.
![The Tao of Kyle… Friend, Actor, Poet, Director… Farmer?]()
by Richard Timothy | Apr 23, 2010 | Gratefully Grateful, I Think There's a Point, Lightbulbs and Soapboxes, My List of Things that Don't Suck, Non-Fiction, Observationally Speaking
Is it wrong that for Earth Day I had a salad for lunch? I wasn’t trying to be insensitive, I was just hungry… just not terribly hungry. So it’s Earth Day. Um, go Earth! I’ve decided that for Earth Day that I would go ahead and anthropomorphize the Earth for a minute or two, which I’m pretty sure has never ever been done before. I even called my mom to make sure.
I think I’d like to start a campaign to rename planets and moons. According to NASA:
“The official names of planets and their moons are governed by an organization called the International Astronomical Union (IAU). The IAU was established in 1919. The IAU is the internationally recognized authority for assigning names to celestial bodies and any surface features on them.
The IAU recognizes that astronomy is an old science and many of its names come from long-standing traditions and/or are founded in history. With the exception of Earth, all of the planets in our solar system have names from Greek or Roman mythology. This tradition was continued when Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto were discovered in more modern times.”
In my opinion they are a little out of date. I’d like to see them with a more contemporary name. We go with names loosely based off of the 7 dwarves or possibly even the Smurfs:
- Change Mercury to Tiny
- Change Venus to Surfette… ok how about Neurotic … hmm, maybe Happy then.
- Change Earth to Lively
- Change Mars to Angry
- Change Saturn to Hoopy
- Change Uranus to Lazy
- Change Neptune to Hungry
- Change Pluto to Lonely
And for the Sun, I think we should all just call it Frank.
I’m not saying these are set in stone, except maybe the Frank thing, but it’s a smirk worth having.
The point being that the anthropomorphized Earth, let’s call her Ethel. Ethel is that one girl that you somehow had every class with that was brilliant, creative, breath taking, but has no idea how amazing she really is. Plus, she’s always really nice, except when she’s not. Also, when she’d go out with someone that was going to treat her like crap and take advantage of her, you’d always get really upset.
I like Ethel, actually I need to call it what it is and what it is, is love. I love Ethel. I can honestly say that if it was not for her I would not be here today. Yeah, I know, I could do those all day. For today though, I am going to share with you my Earth Day activity, and would invite you all try it after you finish reading today’s Earth Day Smirk.
First, go outside. Once there find a patch of grass, dirt, a tree trunk, something organic that is connected to the planet and touch it. If you are going to stand in the sand, grass, dirt, mud, whatever really. Do it barefoot. The point is establishing that connection between you and Earth… your skin against the Earth’s skin.
Then allow yourself to think about it. Don’t think about work, or dinner, or puppies, or your favorite Bee Gees song. Just take a minute to think about the Earth and the connection you are making with it at that moment. If you want to go longer than a minute, by all means take an hour if you want. Whatever is right for you is right for you.
This actually started as a result from a conversation I was having with a surfer in Washington State. He was one of those zenish, zenful… zennanite surfers? He was one of those “Surfing is Zen” people. In our conversation though, he brought up his practice of connecting to the Earth. When he was having a not so Zen day, he would go to the beach and cover himself with sand, and let that connection help him in feeling better. Does it really work? I did for him, and I’d dare say it does if you let it. Ultimately, it’s your choice.
It makes for a good Earth Day moment regardless. If you dig it, the nice thing about it is that you don’t have to wait until next year’s Earth Day to do it again. It’s all yours now, use it whenever you want. I do hope you give it a go and at least try it once. I know I appreciated it when I finally tried it. Besides if you do it barefoot there is always a chance that the grass might tickle your feet, so there is a definite chance you’ll get a giggle out of the whole thing… if you have ticklish feet that is.
Any groovy Earth Day moments you experienced this year?
Image Sources:
Google Images, key words: Earth Day, Pluto, Zen Surfer, and feet in grass.
![The Tao of Kyle… Friend, Actor, Poet, Director… Farmer?]()
by Richard Timothy | Apr 15, 2010 | Gratefully Grateful, I Think There's a Point, Lightbulbs and Soapboxes, My Cutie Baby Sweetie Pie, My List of Things that Don't Suck, Non-Fiction, Observationally Speaking, Public Service Announcement, Reviewed and Recommended
So yesterday, I had managed to put together a few lines for a new Smirk plus an intro and rough outline for a new book and then… I went to a Biz Divas event, with special guest star Lisa Nichols. Yes Lisa was back in town and was speaking at another of my sweetie-baby-cutie-pie-wifey-pooh’s events. The Biz Divas is Angela’s networking and education company for business women and entrepreneurs. So when faced with the option of writing about the finer points of how to best review a Hollywood movie or sharing some of the points Lisa talked about the previous evening, well, let’s just say… take it away Lisa!
See had I actually recorded any of her presentation that would have been a perfect place to put it. I did take some notes though, and I do concede that now would probably be a perfect time for those. Funny thing about perfection, it’s a little more subjective than one might think. One person’s perfection is another person’s pa… something. I was hoping for another p word, but I’m not exactly sure which one fits the way I want it do. Hmm… problem, poppycock, picture frame, ooh how about placency, well complacency. There’s even a p in it and I think it works. Actually, I think I’m looking for the opposite of that word, something like anxiety… only with a p in it. I think I’ve made my… a point.
So when arrived at the event I was a bit bothered. Not because of the event, but because of work. Ok not exactly work, but I received a phone call at work from a Crap-Magnon, which is a lot like a Cro-Magnon except that they look like humans and sound like humans when they speak, but have not evolved to the point that they know how to speak with and be human. They reek of foul, vile energy and after talking to them for about one to two minutes tops, your skin begins crawling and a trigger in your brain that goes off that repeats over and over again that this is not a good person and you need to get away from them as soon as possible.
Even an hour after the call had ended I was still bothered that I had experienced such an intense black hole of negative energy. You could say it was the energetic equivalent of accidentally stepping into a pile of Great Dane pooh. The smell follows you around for a while and it takes a little time to get all of it off. Plus, you’re going to need a water hose to do it.
The water hose arrived when I walked into the event. The room was an energetic white hole, which is the opposite of a black hole… I looked it up. When I walked into the event the room was full of friendly faces, old friends, new friends, friends that will someday be friends, but as of yet we’ve still not met. It was the radiating positive energy of people there. It was light, kind, warm, and accepting. Also, because the room was full of people like that the energy just kept growing, and expanding outward. Five minutes after walking into that room any residuals from the Crap-Magnon caller were all gone. It was a good day and it was only going to get better. So a thank you to everyone there for that, and thanks for the smiles, the hugs, and the love.
Lisa’s presentation was grand, and it was a little different than last time I saw her. This time the focus was on business and some tips, suggestions… make that steps for people to mull through and start with to assist them with their own business. I did like this concept a lot. One of the things that make us all the same is the fact that we are all so different. When you share information designed to help others it helps to have multiple choices that people can choose from, because we’re not all in the same place. One person’s “eureka” is another’s “that was so last year.” Out of the 6 steps she shared there were individuals knowing that Step 1 was just for them while others cradled Step 2 as their “Yes, YES” and so on for each step shared.
Here are the steps Lisa gave, although if you get the chance to see her present these 6 steps I highly recommend you do so. Mainly because she has a brilliant entertaining personal story to go along with each step, and the presentation is definitely going to make you feel all warm and fuzzy.
- Step 1: Begin with the end in mind. It’s good to think about the process, but it just as important to know what the end result looks like.
- Step 2: Give yourself a thousand second chances. It’s not that your idea or dream didn’t work. It just didn’t work that time. Give yourself a second change, and then another, and another, and another. You get the point.
- Step 3: Get someone who is better than you to play with you. Get a coach and/or mentor for your business (art, music, writing, whatever it is you do), to motivate and encourage you, and to remind you that they were once were you are now, and are now were you want to be.
- Step 4: Give yourself permission to have what it is you say you want. If you have no respect for millionaires and think they are all evil and bad people, how can you become one? The more successful you are the more you can share your message and help others. Begin wealthy does not make you a bad person, it only amplifies the person you are.
- Step 5: Bring your family on the journey, but don’t drag them. And don’t wait for them. It is your vision, and you have to keep it going. Either they will support you or they won’t. What you need to do is keep moving forward.
- Step 6: Move from operating like a flood light to operating like a laser. Don’t try to do everything at once. Start with one or two things and focus on those. Once you get those down and they begins running on its own (or the event you planned is over, or the song you wrote is recorded, or the book you wrote is finished), focus on your next vision, idea, product, etc.
And that’s it… six steps. Find the one that speaks to you and own it… or don’t, in the end it’s always going to be your choice and no one else.
Which one was my “ah ha!” step? I think it was a mixture of 1 and 6, but mostly 6, mainly when it comes to my writing. I have already started four novels and only one is roughly finished. 
I get to finish that first book. Proofread, edited, revised, and submitted to publishers. Then it will be time to start working on the next one. I get to be more laser focused on completely finishing my first novel instead focusing on my writing like a puppy with ADD in a bouncy ball factory. Don’t worry though, I’ll keep Smirking as long as people are willing to read and happy to laugh.
It was a good presentation and a good night. Of course when Lisa is in the room, it always is. I wish you all could have been there. But since you couldn’t I guess it’s a good thing I took notes. Yay me!
Any thoughts on today’s Smirk?
Image Sources:
Google Images, key words: Lisa Nichols, 6 steps, rude people, hosing off shoes, and puppy with ball.
There are some farewells that truly are events, were people wear dinner jackets, and sometimes retired space astronaut shows up because they heard there was an open bar, and they really had no plans for the weekend. At some farewells drinks are consumed with such exacting repetition that those drinking could give any synchronized swimming show in Vegas a run for its money. Point of clarification here, by farewell I do not mean… passed on, no more, ceased to be, expired and gone to meet ‘is maker, a stiff, bereft of life, rests in peace, who’s metabolic processes is now history, is off the twig, has kicked the bucket, is shuffled off the mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisible, or is an ex-parrot, err human, and thank you to the Parrot Sketch for their assistance in that explanation. No, by farewell I mean that person being farewelled simply has moved to a new location on this planet that is no longer a short drive away, but at least you can still talk on the phone.
It was the first day of school and I was standing in the lunch line, minding my own business, hoping that they would be serving tater tots for lunch, and the next thing I hear a conversation that sounds like it’s directed at me. I looked around and saw nothing. Then I look down, and there beside me was this little redheaded kid, in glasses, looking up at me waiting for a response. I half expected him ask, “Please sir, may I have some more?” But the second we make eye contact he instead said, “Don’t you just hate it when you are standing in line and some stranger walks up to you and just starts talking to you?”
I could keep going, but I think the point has been made. It has been quite the adventure so far. The farewell arrived rather quickly. He’d only been in town a few months. Still, it was a really good few months having him within driving distance again. The thing about Kyle is that he is the epitome of a true Goonie, the adventure never really ends with that man. This farewell is, for now, a 9 month endeavor. I mean regardless of how long he’ll be away, he’ll be back for New Years. It’s a kind of ceremony if you will. We’ve only missed spending it together a few times in the past 25 years.
