Smirk of the Day, Dec. 10
I tried killing a spider using hairspray. It didn’t work, but I’ve got to say its hair does look fabulous.
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
Smirk of the Day, Dec. 7
Why is it when a professional athlete refers to himself in third person we think he’s arrogant and a bit of a tool. However, when Elmo did it we thought he was adorable.
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
Smirk of the Day, Dec. 6
My first impulse when I see an animal is to say hello. Yet, when I see a person, my first impulse is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
Smirk of the Day, Dec. 5
I want to be buried in a spring loaded coffin filled with confetti and a banner over my chest says, “You found me!” That way when I am eventually dug up by a future archaeologist, they will have the best day at work ever!
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
Smirk of the Day, Dec. 4
I want to hire a giant hulking guy and name him “The Force”. Then I could use “The Force” to bring me things, push things, hold things in the air, help me do a hand stand, and other activities that the force could be used for.
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
Smirk of the Day, Dec. 3
I think we should all pretend that there isn’t a sports team called the Giants, that way when you read someone’s status about them winning you can read it like we have just lost a war with a mythical race of very large people. “THE GIANTS WON? DEAR GOD, NOOOOOO!”
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.