“I felt a little bad about spraying some mosquito repellent on a mosquito this past weekend . . . now he’ll never have any friends.”
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
“Occasionally reminiscing with friends and family about your childhood is a lot like being drunk. In that everyone remembers everything you did, except you.”
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
“I think all the guys wearing skinny jeans took the phrase “getting in her pants” the wrong way.”
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
“Did you know there is species of antelope capable of jumping higher than the average house. This is due to the antelope’s powerful hind-legs and the fact that the average house cannot jump.”
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
06.07 (from 2012)
“There needs to be an app that cancels your memberships right before your free trials run out.”
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.
“I hate when I’m trying to be handsome and a more handsome man stands next to me and handsomes much harder than I can.”
I think I originally read something similar to this off of some random person’s status. Thanks random person.